The Road to Recovery: Easy does it

I am, officially, wobbly. No, this doesn’t mean that I’ve suddenly taken a turn for the worse. It’s because I’ve come to realise that my balance, post accident, is shockingly bad.

Why this should be the case, I’m not sure. I can see why my legs might want to give way every time they have weight put on them. Before I started rehabbing they’d done nothing for the best part of two months (left leg) and three months (right leg). So some form of protest was probably in order (although they seem to think it’s serious enough to warrant the intervention of the UN). But the difficulties with balance I don’t get.

I’ve discovered the problem since I’ve been attempting to do some basic things that I used to take for granted, like using my beloved Delonghi espresso maker for the purpose of not being a horrible grouch in the morning. Or making a cuppa in the afternoon. Or even making use of the disabled facilities now I’ve started to venture out of the house (you’ve no idea how frustrating it is to be confined to a couple of rooms).

All of these entail some standing up without recourse to the comforting crutch of my hospital supplied frame. And it’s standing without that frame that has has made me realise that my balance has been shot to pieces.

I stand up, all is fine, and then a slight movement to one side, or forward and all of a sudden I get this horrible queasiness welling up and the fear that I’m going to topple over like some demented ten pin bowling skittle.

It’s a disturbing sensation that I’ve never felt before. I suddenly feel like I’m falling without actually doing so. Cue panicked grab for a sideboard and much frenzied panting.

Perhaps it’s not actually balance. It might be trying to concentrate hard on two things at once – pre-accident standing was not something that had to be thought about. It’s reflexive: you just do it. Now it requires a conscious effort of will. Remaining vertical is even harder. Add coffee making to the mix, and you can see where the problems develop.

Still, it has to be worth it. That espresso tastes doubly good for having been self-made. And everyone’s the happier when my morning demeanor can be described as medium civilised (if a little surly) as opposed to bear, just coming out of hibernation, head unbelievably tender.

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