Barking Blondes: Dogs in cars, and Top of the Pooch Pops
Half way down Harley Street, a motorcycle policeman tapped on the window and asked us to pull over. Both our dogs, Molly and Matilda, were strapped in safely. Unfortunately, the same couldn’t be said for US. He motioned for us to pull over.
“I’ve been following your vehicle all the way down Marylebone Road waiting for you to fasten your seatbelts.”, he said, sticking his head into the car. “Your dogs are travelling legally. Why aren’t you?”
Maybe its because we don’t value our lives so highly? Mind you, it takes a brave man to stick his head into a car with two bull breeds. Nothing to do with fear of attack, more to do with the stench. It’s akin to travelling in a kennel. So much dog hair that neither of our mothers will accept a lift. This police officer recoiled and fined us sixty quid on the spot. All without breathing in.
A book of photographs is soon to be published, featuring dogs in cars. Stationary cars, with dogs either behind the wheel or seated as passengers. Most dogs are nosey. So it thrills them to travel at high speed with little effort, overtaking pedestrian pooches, whilst admiring the scenery. Admittedly not all dogs are great travellers. We have sympathy for those who whine, vomit , or shake from head to toe. However, the majority enjoy chauffeur driven luxury. The best sight of the summer so far, has to have been a Standard Poodle being driven through Richmond Park with his head sticking out of a Mercedes sunroof, ears flying. His olfactory senses on overdrive. Making sense of his world through his nose. Living life in the fast lane.
A little known band, Police Dog Hogan, have written a song for our bulldog Matilda. They sent it to us on an MP3. Proving that flattery is everything, we played it on our radio show and very soon we were inundated with dog track suggestions. Did you know that The Monkeys have a lesser known 1966 track called “Gonna Buy Me A Dog’?. It never featured in their TV series, but was on their first ever album. DJ Bobo ‘s rendition of Chihuahua, from the movie Beverley Hills Chihuahua, is a rap style dance number, and, guaranteed to create a party atmosphere.
Scott Walker’s song “The Girls And The Dogs”, parodies both our lives in the city, whilst Perry Como’s “‘Hot Diggity Dog” rates as one of the all time top novelty tunes. Paul McCartney wrote about his sheepdog dog Martha in “Martha My Dear” and then later about his other dog “Jet “ from the Band On The Run Album. Although there is some dispute that it could have been his pony. Who cares? Canine or equine, all singer song writers need a muse. It seems that these bands, if they had dogs, were inspired enough to write about man’s best friend. We would love any other suggestions of mutt music in your collections.
Finally, an email was sent out at work, enquiring why what looked like sex toys were left on the floor of Studio 24C. We are eager to point out that these are new inventive dog toys, inspired by a pooches need to masticate. The bendy long rubber tube is perfect for teething puppies. It’s also durable enough for adult dogs to play tugger as well as being kind on the teeth. Mental stimulation prevents boredom. However, maybe for the sake of reputation, its best not to keep them scattered about!
BARKING AT THE MOON,THURSDAYS 10pm-12 BBC LONDON 94.9
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