Barking Blondes: Duchy doggy dinners, four-legged royals and a very British bulldog

Prince Charles feeds our two dogs, Molly and Matilda, sausages every week. In fact his generosity must extend to hundreds of mutts whose owners pass, daily through The Honest Sausage’s doors, in Regent’s Park. Any of his prize pork  Duchy bangers, left over from the day before, are sold cheaply as a “dog plate” across the counter of this  jolly café. There are also bowls of water and a dog park on wheels.

We believe, that as long as we have a royal family, then dogs will be welcome in royal parks. After all, the Windsors love a pooch. And as the saying goes “if you are looking for love, love a dog!”

For Tatler magazine to put a corgi in a crown, on the front cover of their Diamond Jubilee edition, was inspired. It also demonstrates this country’s ever increasing affection for dogs. The Queen’s obvious love of her corgis was often referred to as a bit eccentric but now her Pembroke pedigrees adorn tea towels, tea pots and t shirts. Their chubby canine profiles, have become as much a connection with this royal event, as any human image.

Of course one of Her Majesty’s corgis came to a sad demise when it was taken on by Princess Anne’s bull terrier. What followed was a bad domestic that ended sadly. Anne’s dog won. Let’s hope Will and Kate’s cocker spaniel puppy Lupo is quick to learn royal  canine etiquette. During the flotilla, will all the Household’s mutts be locked up together whilst their owners are sailing down the Thames? Will Camilla’s jack russell (rescued from Battersea), Kate’s cocker, the corgis, Charles’ gun dogs all be shut up in the dining room? Do they leave the telly on for them? Is there a dog flap into Buck Palace’s back yard?

Dogs have always had homes in the royal palaces. Queen Victoria adored her Pomeranians .Edward and Mrs Simpson doted on their pugs. The King’s Speech was peppered with scenes with corgis on the lap of Queen Elizabeth, the Queen Mother. Prince Philip’s choice of hound has never been revealed. Something frisky and long snouted perhaps? A blonde Finnish spitz?  Princess Diana never owned a dog during her marriage, but Kensington Palace opened its grounds to its first ever dog show last year. We were honoured to be judges. And the Ladies room had Jo Malone handwash. However, it was akin to treason when Matilda peed on the lawn.

This Tuesday, we will be sitting at an urban trestle table, our dogs between our feet, raising a toast, along with the rest of our street. In fact all dog lovers are being urged by The Eden Project to celebrate The Big Jubilee Lunch with A Dogs Dinner of A Jubilee at Battersea. Tripe is on the menu for our two girls and semolina, for us. They favour offal, we love a milk pudding. We will then walk a celebratory lap around a royal park and greet other dog walkers with the customary nod and smile , indulging in the knowledge that as long as there is a mutt on the royal couch, dogs in parks are safe.

Which reminds us, talking of royals and dog walking. The intruder , Michael Fagin’s brief visit into Buckingham Palace was apparently made possible because the corgis were out on a walk. Or could it be that they are as useless at guarding as our two!

‘Barking at the Moon’ is on Thursdays from 10pm-midnight on BBC London 94.9fm

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• Ziggydog

  The Royal Parks definitely set London apart in terms of spaces for dogs. The Honest Sausage, yum yum. The Corgis have played a real role in the Queen’s reign by her side. Just a decade ago for the Golden Jubilee they hardy featured in the festivities, so it’s great to see Corgi artwork adorn bunting. It must make the Queen very proud of her dogs, I bet she can’t wait to see Pudsey perform at The Royal Variety. 

• http://www.facebook.com/graham.robertson.14 Graham Robertson

  Magnificent work ladies..i used to reside with one of Lady Diana’s domestic staff and they informed me in the utmost sincerity that the very reason she didn’t keep a woofie was that they kept “nibbling at her Bourbons” ..i admire you ladies tremendously you are ,by far, the most entertaining listen on the airwaves,God bless you and your woofers!

• Annerbelle

  Perhaps Diana didn’t like dogs, not a great lover of them myself but find your radio show very amusing.

• Gizwiz

  The 2 girls look lovely in their patriotic pose! Have to say, that although I congatulate Her Majesty on her 60 years, by the end of the weekend I had rather had enough about the celebrations and by Tuesday afternoon had resorted to watching repeats of Top Gear Specials on Dave rather than have to put up with any more dire BBC coverage! In fact Barking remains one of the best programme to come out of the BBC at the moment. Keep it up.

• http://www.facebook.com/people/Karen-C-Chamberlain/1241322314 Karen C Chamberlain

  What a right Royal weekend, we attened a Very Kentish Garden Party, (You must come and visit us here Ladies) the Girls, Gracie and Angel were in full Union Jack Attire, Tutus lifting in the wind!  So many compliments and photos taken!  No matter were we are everyone loves a Bulldog but they love a Bulldog in a Tutu a little bit more!  We had a right Royal weekend making us proud to be British, we really wanted to take the dogs into London but far too busy for them so we watched it on the TV in the DRY!  WE LOVE you photo of the Royal Matilda & Molly love them all draped in Union jackness how barking WOOF WOOF!  Keep writing girls it cheers our week up to read about you, listen to you would love to WATCH you too on TV or at the theatre Love and Bulldog Kisses Karen & ALl the Maverick Girlies WOOF WOOF WOOF! xxxxx

• Teresa Stokes

  Are you sure she didn’t say “nibbling at her baubles”?