Parcel of Rewired Humptys in a Black Hole

We have a worthy winner. It is still only Sunday of the Liberal Democrat conference, and the judges have already awarded the week’s Hogwash Prize. Nick Clegg told Andrew Marr on BBC1 this morning:

This is part and parcel of something which I think most people agree with, which is that as we fill in the black hole in the public finances, as we fill in the banks, we’ve also got to make sure that we don’t just put Humpty Dumpty back together again and make the same old mistakes; that we rewire the British economy to make it fairer and give people more opportunities.

That high score for “clichés and weird metaphors” per square inch looks unbeatable. Nominated by Helen Lewis.

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• Farweasel

  We could tolerate the hyperbole if experience hadn’t taught us that what Cleggie meant by that was ‘but really I’ll connive with my Tory chums behind the scenes to make sure it all comes out exactly as it was before’.

  Followed by ’sorry’ 2 years later when the gaffe’s blown.