Could Britney Spears write the next Great American Novel?

No idea what this is about or why anybody is asking this question, which appears as a sub-headline on an MTV webpage in the middle of words that include “collabo” but do not include any explanation of Spears’s connection with novel-writing.

Whatevs, pop pickers. The answer is no, and the spotter of this question, Mitchell Stirling, wins a signed copy of my book, Questions To Which The Answer Is No.

Our second winner this week is Emma Revell, who was the first to spot this question on the BBC:

Is this dog a maths genius?

This is one of the oldest staples of credulous amazeballs. It has long been established that people watching a “counting” animal praise it when it reaches the expected number and the animal then knows to stop.

Those, then, are numbers 883 and 884 in my series of QTWTAIN.

Other people spotted the same story, by which time its headline was subtly different:

Is this dog cleverer than its owner?

As Big Gaz pointed out, the owner is claiming that his dog is a maths genius, so the answer is in some doubt.

My publisher, Elliott & Thompson, still have four more signed copies to give away before Christmas, so keep those QTWTAIN coming in. And now there are two ways to win. Waterstones is also offering free signed copies of the book if you get on the Twitter and retweet this.

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• creggancowboy

  Dear John, Usually I have a go at you but today and this post marks a first. My first compliment to you. Great graphics, keep it up. May I suggest Vicky Binns, Hayley Atwell and/or Romola Garai next time? Yours in admiration, C.