Look, you can’t put that on the Banned List

John Rentoul

cherry banana fruit salad Look, you cant put that on the Banned ListThe Banned List Committee is struggling to keep up with the backlog. There was a delay this morning as a special emergency session rejected an application to have “Look –” at the start of politicians’ sentences added to the List. Clive Davis and Holly Brodie made the kind of enthusiastic and confident appeals that would have persuaded most cricket umpires, but the Committee is made of sterner stuff and insisted that the formula is on the Blair Memorial Exemption List.

With that vexatious litigation out of the way, the Supplementary Legislation Sub-Committee was able to approve the next 10 additions to the Banned List:

1. “If it looks like an X, and it sounds like an X, then it probably is an X.” Nominated by Jim Shelley.

2. “A work in progress.”

3. “Sunset” as a verb. No, I can’t believe it either. But Mary Novakovich says it has happened.

4. “Reaching out” in emails. Mary Novakovich.

5. “So sue me.” Citizen Sane.

6. “Cherry picking.” Della Mirandola. Has to be banned owing to radical uncertainty about why it should mean “taking the best bits”. I thought it was something to do with fruit salad (above). According to Wikipedia, it is the name of the fallacy that, because cherry pickers pick only ripe cherries, all cherries are ripe. Nothing to do with “low-hanging fruit”, which is also on the List.

7. “Across the piste”, the illegitimate cousin of “across the piece”, bannedlisted in February. Ivor Stolliday.

8. “Westminster bubble” has been added to “Westminster village”.

9. “Concrete steps”, as promised by Ed Miliband for 2013. Ian Jones.

10. “As you do.” Citizen Sane.

Previous additions to the List are recorded in these posts on this blog, and form an online Supplement to the published The Banned List, available in paper and digital versions.

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  • creggancowboy

    Cherry picking is what the UK does with the ECHR, implementing laws it likes but not those (prisoner votes, deleting DNA of 2 million innocent folks) it does not. Wake up and smell the cawfee.

  • Pacificweather

    Maraschino cherries on fruit salad. Now that really is nostalgia.

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