The day Boris Johnson nearly set about slaughtering London’s foxes
Boris Johnson has confessed that he came close to committing a gross injustice that would have involved innocent creatures being blasted to death at gunpoint – and all over an anonymous cat.
The Mayor was speaking at a debate in London that presaged a new role he is undertaking soon as a radio host on LBC. “I got absolutely wild with anger, not so long ago, because I thought our cat had been mauled by a fox,” he told his interviewer, Nick Ferrari.
“Our cat came in and he was completely mashed up and I was convinced a fox had done it and I wanted to go out with my .22 and blaze away. I shouldn’t be saying this. I was all set, but – by the way I’m allowed to have a .22 – but you’re not allowed to shoot a fox. That is for the local pest control officers…”
“How is your cat?” Ferrari asked.
“That’s the interesting thing,” the Mayor replied. “The cat is much improved. After I’d felt these feelings of blind anger towards the fox population and nursed in my breast the desire to go and massacre the lot of them, I looked at the cat more closely and I started to wonder whether his injuries were actually compatible with cat-on-cat violence. You know, It’s all too easy to stigmatise people!”
“I can’t disclose the name of the cat,” he added. “Well actually it has various names, but it’s called ‘Cat’ basically.”
He was speaking at The State of London Debate debate hosted by LBC last night at Methodist Central Hall in Westminster, where it was announced that he will host a phone-in on LBC 97.3, called ‘Ask Boris’. starting on Tuesday 2nd July. Nick Clegg, who has a slot on LBC, has since called the Mayor a ’slacker’, because his appearances are to be once a month, whereas the Deputy Prime Minister goes in every week.
Thereagain, Boris Johnson has a city to run.
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