You are here : Home » IndyBlogs Home

 Subscribe to RSS

« Today in Politics: 10p tax rate climbdown | Main | Today in Politics: Prime Minister's U-turns »

Wednesday, 23 April 2008

The Gutter Sniper: Agyness Deyn in mundane/fascinating detail

03agy Ok, ok, we get it. We know she was Tatler's number one best dressed, and we realise that she's a perfectly enchanting, regionally-accented punky little ingenue and we can tell that her 80s thrift shop attire, while hideous, is also somehow chic. But - seriously - is there no limit to fashion's fawning over Agyness Deyn?

Judging by the current edition of i-D, we may have to go with a "no". Never known for their capacity to withstand the latest fad, they've fallen for this one hook, line and sinker. In a display of sycophancy so dazzling that it has left even cynical old us somewhat bemused, the latest issue is billed as a 178 page "Agy special," including interviews with the girl's family, portraits of her feet and - inexplicably - shots of other "regular" folk dressing up in homage. Nice!

Insights gleaned include her favourite poem ("I Wanna be Yours" by John Cooper Clarke, performance poet, hipster, self-styled "Bard of Salford"), her favourite mode of transport (a taxi when in New York, but her Vespa when in London, natch) - and the fact that she rides a bicycle in Hull (it's the fastest route out).

Meanwhile conspicuous best friend-cum-hanger-on Henry Holland writes her an ode ("We met back home04agy down the Burnley Road/I was quiff, hoodie and that skateboard I rode/You were bob, braces and legs to your pits/smokin a fag on that wall where you'd sit") and occasional employer and loyal patron of i-D's advertising space Christopher Baily shares his views on her symbolic value ("Agyness represents what Cool Youth is all about. The power to see the future. The energy to do it"). Moving, no?

Other mundane/obsessive details: a splash on biker boots ("because Agyness loves a biker boot!"), a guide to taxidermy (because that's her "dream holiday"), some eye patches (she once had conjunctivitus) and Emily Hollins' thoughts on New York graffiti (because she's her sister). 

Oh, a brief footnote - turn to page 30 and you get to see full-length Agy sporting Marc Jacobs, with added caption: "First Fiddy Cent had dentists despairing when he invited you to his Candy Shop, then Snoop got his sticky icky icky on with Candy and now Madonna is asking all and sundry to chow down on her Turkish delight. Well, never one to shy away from a trend the sickly sweet Marc Jacobs is getting in on the confectionery action." 

This, I'm sure you'll agree, throws up many questions. First: what? And second: since when had candy been out of fashion? It's been affecting my waistline since AT LEAST 1986. Also: Wasn't that 50 Cent song out in, like, 2005? Don't they know he's all about the movies these days?

Comments

I didn't realise i-D was still going. Kudos to them for not going under like similar Nathan Barley-type operations and for being as barking as ever.

she's probably as thick as two short planks and incredibly boring...just another image to obsess over for 'the industry' to make money. AA Gill just about sums it up in his book 'AA Gill is Away' on the chapter on the fashion industry; funny but downright creepy.

How about some commentary on the Emma Watson crotch shots... you're the gutter sniper right??? Well get your head in the gutter!

hnqmvd fzqxmdknr aqdm bekojgwzy cfslam rcoevf hguqxca

Verify your Comment

Previewing your Comment

This is only a preview. Your comment has not yet been posted.

Working...
Your comment could not be posted. Error type:
Your comment has been posted. Post another comment

The letters and numbers you entered did not match the image. Please try again.

As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.

Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.

Working...

Post a comment