And so, and so - to the latest member of the actress/singer/some-kind-of activist club. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Madonna, phase 52: The Political Years.
Yes that's right: newly inducted into the Rock 'n Roll hall of fame, it's now time for Pop's Queen to get serious. So much so that she's started weighing in on London's mayoral campaign.
Last week she shared her own particular brand of insanity with Q magazine (that ol' bastion of political reporting) and complained that musicians weren't given enough tax breaks. If she were mayor, she said, she would ensure that they were exempt "so they have more money to do other things" - a statement to which we can only respond, "Ummm, like what? Crack?"
She even managed to introduce some retro-populist terminology, waving the around the old "Red Ken." And she protested against the congestion charge.
But you know what the most surprising thing was? We were tempted - just for a moment - to give her a break. Maybe even listen to what she had to say. I mean, all that moving to Britain, wearing tweed and adopting third-worlders... that's gotta be hard work, right? So we were thinking... maybe like, an "A" for effort or something? And then we saw this.
NATO, it would seem, thought the exact same thing. Here's an extract from a piece on their website entitled "Madonna or die":
The quality of adapting to new tasks whilst staying true to one's own principles is something which business analysts qualify as the Madonna-curve. This curve is named after the legendary pop-diva who reinvented herself each time her style and stardom went into inevitable decline, but whose audacity has lifted her up to ever higher levels of relevance and fame. NATO should follow the Madonna-curve, and not wait till its controversies escalate into public wrangles... There is no perfect time for a strategic extreme make-over of the Alliance. So today is as good a time as any.
No really, that is a direct quote.
(Photo: Getty Images)
Please tell me this is an April Fool's joke and that business analysts do not talk about Madonna-curves.
Posted by: Jakers | Wednesday, 02 April 2008 at 11:05 AM
You know that was my first though too. But I first spotted this two days ago which makes me think it can't be. Any evidence to the contrary is welcome. More than welcome.
Posted by: The Gutter Sniper | Wednesday, 02 April 2008 at 11:15 AM
What a silly excuse for "reporting" this is, and what an intellectually savvy, biting writer you are!
Unfortunately, you've decided to distort facts and happily take things to a ridiculous extreme for the sake of nasty... what do you call it again? Oh, yes, "journalism." Madonna simply jokingly mentioned that she thought struggling artists should not have to pay high transport, linked from a conversation about how hard it is to be a poor, struggling wannabe. Big deal. And where does your "crack" comment get off? Because all aspiring musos are crack addicts?!
And the NATO quote is just one small reference using, yes, a cultural term used in business and culture analysis, because Madonna - hello - is the most successful star of our times, when everyone else has come and gone. So, like any successful businessman or woman, her trends and devices are studied and phrases are "coined". Again, big deal, it's not like NATO are seriously looking to Madonna, they're just talking about rebranding, and made a general reference.
You people are pathetic.
Posted by: Aaron | Wednesday, 02 April 2008 at 02:04 PM
Indeed!
Posted by: Carl | Wednesday, 02 April 2008 at 03:29 PM
OF COURSE all aspiring musos are on crack! EVERYONE knows that. Duh!
Posted by: The Gutter Sniper | Wednesday, 02 April 2008 at 04:35 PM