By Rob Sharp
Here’s an analogy for you. Imagine there’s a horse. Like another famous horse, this nag has the initials “BB”. And, for what it’s worth, it’s a healthy horse. It’s popular. Indeed, many people pay to see it, and for many years it lives, content, in a plush meadow. But one day, the horse feels ill. After a number of weeks – in which various people try to treat it – BB’s owners realise it is beyond convalescence. A few days later, it dies.
Unfortunately, BB’s owners refuse to accept the passing of their favourite farm animal. So every day, they go down to its stable and try to shake it awake. “If only you’ll come to life,” they implore. “Everything will be alright? Won’t it, BB?”
But nothing happens. BB stays asleep, ignoring their pleading. Indeed, the owners soon become frustrated by their lack of progress. They start lashing out at the deceased equine. They flail it; they shake it violently. It remains inert. It has the cross-hatched eyes of a corpse, now. Blood and pus start seeping from its putrefying mouth. All in all, it’s a pretty sordid tale.
That aside, at 9pm tonight, Channel 4 will start broadcasting what will no doubt become the critically reviled, yet financially lucrative, Big Brother 9. OK, so, we shouldn’t watch it. But many of us do. I have no idea why. I can’t help mocking the whole thing but I am the world’s biggest hypocrite for tuning in. I suspect I am not alone.
So, anyway, what’s the deelio? Well, the tabloids are saying it is going to include the house’s first ever *couple*. Yup.
Others to feature (reportedly) are going to be: a Buddhist, a comedian, a DJ (now that’s weird) and a blind man. A reject from Popstars: The Rivals is going to rock up, as well as a London chef. Rex, 24, is labelled by his mates as “a proper playboy”. Though I too have been to All Bar One.
This, as a wise man once said, is going to be huge.
put big brother on firday to saturday at 8.oopm
thank u love u all good luck
MISS HALL
Posted by: hasina | Thursday, 05 June 2008 at 08:15 PM
hi
i so love big brother its on tonight at 9.00 i just cant wait OMG
Posted by: Jade | Thursday, 05 June 2008 at 08:42 PM
its like so wicked like i cant wait yo yo big bro rocks my world
Posted by: bigbro | Thursday, 05 June 2008 at 08:49 PM
this year is going to be a good 1.not booked a holiday till big bro is over.the guy that looks like joey from friends was on ant and dec show a while ago a bit of a plonker;;
Posted by: sharon | Thursday, 05 June 2008 at 11:13 PM
this year's launch was the best ever!
big brother better not be going anywhere - its the best show on telly
Posted by: ROB | Friday, 06 June 2008 at 12:44 AM
That said, there'd better not be Channel 4 plants in here...
Posted by: Rob Sharp | Friday, 06 June 2008 at 06:03 AM